Interconnections
by pixienewt676
Summary: "She was the epitome of his innocence. Try as he might, he can't seem to bury her." A series of oneshots filled with small glimpses of back and forths between the boy who was too afraid of the light and the girl who was unalarmed of the dark.
1. 1988-1992

Hullo! This would be a compilation of interconnected one shots, though could still stand alone if you would fancy it to be. I have not the slightest clue as to where this would head, but please let me know if you prefer it to have a happy or angsty ending?

Reviews are welcomed!

* * *

 **Before** \- _Sometime on July 1988_

Sometimes, when the manor goes too dark, Draco Malfoy finds himself in his mother's garden.

Commonly, other children his age would most definitely hide in their blankets or behave frantically because there is no such thing as self respect or what his father likes to call it, pride, inside their tiny systems. But in just a tender age of eight, Draco already learned firsthand not to allow anybody to see him quiver.

Sometimes, when the sun sets behind the hills, Luna Lovegood finds herself heavily drawn to fascinating places, especially magnificent creatures. There was a patch of majestic white feathers gliding around inside the hedges of the humongous castle just a few thumbs away based on the measurement of her finger. According to her daddy, those elegant birds were albino peacocks and were owned by a certain Lucius Malfoy.

Curiosity got the best of her. It was normal for her to have weird creatures, plants and things scattered inside their round house, but never before have she met a person who lives in a giant castle with an equally giant birds as pets! She guessed that Lucius Malfoy must be the owner of everything that is expensive. Why on earth would he live in a giant house if he did not intend to fill it with a whole neighborhood?

She rolled, kicked and frolicked her way to the castle. With just her yellow dress flowing around her skin and her feet bare, she went off with an excited smile. It was just like her daddy's expeditions. Mainly, she only imagined the hills and the creatures by his colorful words, but she was positive her little trip might be like those. In fact, he once told her the secret behind a successful trip. It was not about traveling to far off kingdoms, it was the way people gather information in their surroundings; as long as you learn, as long as you grow, and as long as you find beauty, it is a great adventure.

She was extra positive about her first expedition. She can feel it in her bones, she would definitely catch quite an experience. One that would cause a shift in her life.

While little Luna was taking her time slaying invisible creatures with her invisible sword, little Draco was sitting idly upon a branch of a sycamore tree, eyeing the odd looking house a few curves away. He found himself utterly curious, trying to form an image of a sane man inside his young mind. Unfortunately, he could not- he and his father would certainly not last long in the said peculiar home.

But of course!

The residents must not be humans. Yes.

That was the most logical thing he could possibly think of.

On his far right, he heard some rustling as well as movements from the innocent hedge. The deepening sky and the silence made the rustling intense, making his heart beat loudly and his imagination alive and activated. He glanced to the door of their patio, trying to decipher how many steps he has to take before he would make it safely to the safety of his house. Once inside, he is convinced that his father would know just what to do.

Yet, hearing another rustle, his pride and developing rational thoughts were slightly overpowered by his fright

"Who-who's there?" he shouted, his eyes betraying the fear he tried to cover. Despite being way too far up the tree, he still couldn't see what lies behind the tall hedge. Even arching his head up was an effort that ended in failure.

The sound of his voice was the straw the mysterious creature had waited for. The rustling eventually stopped. Draco climbed down from his spot, edging towards the thick hedge.

"Hullo! Are you, by any chance, a peacock?"

There was a faint voice just behind the hedge. It was a girl, a girl who's probably a young one just like him. She sounded like one, but judging by her barmy question, she was indeed much more prone with imagining than he is. He could not possibly question someone's existence to a peacock. That was too silly.

He stood frigid on the other side of the hedge, startled with the question and even more with having a random person on their usually quiet and brooding property

"No I am not."

"Oh, perhaps you're Mr. Hedge! Could you help me enter, kind sir?"

His eyebrows shot straight up near his forehead. Silly was an understatement. He now presume that the girl was slightly batty. Like the odd house far away from his home.

"Go away thief"

He could not risk his life. His father would go ballistic if he would let a thief in. Or worse, a filthy muggle.

"But I am not a thief. Would a thief ask for your help Mr. Hedge?"

He cringed with the thought that the girl might be laughing at the other side. He could not let that happen. At his mere age, he already has the social awareness some aristocrats have. He could not let her have the last say. His father taught him not to back down so easily.

"I am not a hedge. That's idiotic"

"It is not. It could happen you know, you haven't seen the secrets the world tries to hide. Who knows? Maybe they talk when we sleep. My daddy says that's why I sleepwalk, they talk to me when I am unconscious- Are you a person then?"

He seemed to predict that his eyebrows had move one step up on his face. With the strange conversation he's having, no doubt his psyche would alter. The girl was certainly different.

"Obviously"

"Are you Lucius Malfoy?"

In contrast, his eyebrows, for once in their conversation, frowned.

"No"

He resorted to a closed reply, wanting to trap the girl into having no further reason to continue talking to him. As much as how bluntly he brags about being Lucius Malfoy's son, he reminded himself to also be cautious, who knew what evil plan the girl had in store for his father?

"Do you talk to your plants?"

Instead, she found another blabber for him to either frown or raise an eyebrow with.

"Who even does that?"

"My mum, daddy, and I do. They get a bit lonely you know. Do you ever get lonely?"

She again made him halt. It was a strange question indeed, but he found it more strange that he was considering her. He was taught not to surrender himself to his emotions, nevertheless, open his palms willingly for the whole wizardling world to see. He said it was scandalous, weak. But-

But the girl was vocal with hers. It was kind of towering. Immensely frightening.

"No I don't"

There was a small pause from her, which he was quite taken aback from.

"You must have several friends then, that is wonderful" her tone, much to his annoyance, was unconvinced.

"Of course, who doesn't?" he half hoped he sounded convincing in his second time. It was not that he was trying to impress her, it was wholly for the sake of his image. He could not let her think he was an outcast because he is definitely not. He is far from that in the social ladder, he was in fact, the one the other children envy. And he tend to keep relinquishing in that social pool.

"I am, they think I am too weird. But I think that's not bad at all. There's nothing to be ashamed of it"

He pretended not to feel the tone in her voice that made him know she was way pass the hidden message he tried to cover. He was, after all, as his father calls it, an amateur with controlling his nerves. He might've just imagined her being understanding, there was no way she could possibly guess him right there and then.

"I should be going now, nargles would most likely attack in the dim and cold" Draco, to his surprise, did not notice the slightly noticeable moon above them. He also forgot about why he was in his mother's garden in the first place.

He felt her shift to the hedge between them, as if waiting for him to say something. He however, kept his mouth shut. Not even when he was tempted to ask what nargles are or why she talked to him nonstop even if he made it clear he did not want company. The want did not seem to pass but he knows he could not simply introduce himself to a suspecting stranger, that would be too troublesome.

"Good bye for now," she made a point to emphasize the implication that she would return no sooner than later ",my name is Luna, like the moon,"

There was another rustling in the hedge, but this time, he did not flinch or even bat an eye. He simply watched, curiosity filling the insides of his skin. But it was thankfully not enough to make him call her. He did not tell her his name, he was certain she would forget about him sooner or later. He was nothing but dreadful to her after all.

"Thank you"

The two words did not seem right, yet he wholesomely took it from her. He was not sure what so ever he did that made her glad of him. But it was rare and raw, he indulged in it like a new found accomplishment.

He sat staring at the skies above him, glaring at the beaming moon that seemed to stare back. He vaguely wonder if by tomorrow at eve, he would actually see the strange Luna again. And if his mother knew a dangerous pesky creatures deemed as nargles.

* * *

 **After** \- _Sometime in 1992_

He watched as she got sorted into the wise bunch.

He watched as she effortlessly smiled at the older Ravenclaw next to her

He watched as she beamed at the older students who prodded, nevertheless teased, about the ridiculous set of earrings she always loved wearing.

He watched, keeping in track with the latest things she was up to. Not that he cared, no, really. She was just so often teased and wholesomely odd, he pitied her.

He continued watching, keeping a safe distance between them, excusing himself from the guilt by seeing her and making sure she still manages to live another day in the campus. For the life of him, he does not have an exact reason why he was avoiding her. He, in fact, already made a reputation his father was thrilled about. Surely he wouldn't let a single girl make him less powerful.

But sometimes, since the day they met, she hold such position in his life that he has trouble shrugging her off. Even so at that particular moment when they collided to each other rather physically.

He straightened his cloak and checked his slick hair just in cause some strands fell from their usual glamour. The younger girl seemed dazed down the earthly ground, seemingly choosing the comfort of the dirt rather than remember the scattered things around her.

He rolled his eyes and sat upon his Nimbus 2001, hovering just a foot above the ground, a few inches away from her.

"Hullo Draco"

"I told you not to speak to me so openly didn't I, _Lovegood_?" he never called her Lovegood before, not even when after the two years duration of them not speaking. It had always been 'Luna, the one who accused him of being a talking hedge, the one who made him ask his mother just what was the deal with harmful nargles.

"You did, but nobody's out here you know. At this time of day, I suspect everybody's already slipping in their dormitories" She acted unfazed about the coldness of his voice, her eyes not meeting his in the process. Perhaps, she did not wanted him to see the sorry look in her eyes. She pitied him. Probably for having been the one who made their team lose. And that infuriated him further.

"Whatever, at least I am not out here looking for my shoes I lost the other night. I have much more important things to attend to, such as a reputation to manage" he spatted, trying so hard to be fearsome despite the tired shoulders and aching muscles he had inside his skin.

That made the girl's attention move to him, her eyes clear from hurt and accusations. She simply looked at him, unfazed with his cold treatment to her innocent statement.

"I am not having the grandest time here yet. But I am still not ashamed though. It is not my fault they are close minded" she momentarily shrugged, eerie and whimsical as ever. Draco took her words by heart, sliding an invisible hedge between the two of them.

He sighed inwardly, ignoring the thought forming in his head. He was much too tired to even think of their different social standings. He knew she was somewhat, seeing the positive side of things even when she was clearly, being taunted and teased so immensely by others.

Looking back at her, he tried to shrug the feeling again, explaining to himself that he just did what he had to do. It was her decision to remain as peculiar as she normally is so why would he even bother?

"Good night, Draco Malfoy"

Her voice turned quite softer and his guilt turned a tad more heavy. He ought to say something, anything, especially those two simple words he should have told her far too long ago. But instead, he gripped far tightly to his broom, forcing himself to edge further away from her.

That night, the moon stared at him far too intensely and he blamed the fictional nargles for the tugging guilt.


	2. 1988-1993

**Before- A week after the meeting**. _The summer of July, 1988_

It had been a week, a week that made him glance and deny the fact that he took her words seriously. It was not that he expected her to come, he knows too well that she was slightly crazy. She must've thought it was all a dream and shrugged it off by hunting the nar? narlus?, what ever the made up specie's name was. Still though, she was full of fascinating garb, he cannot help but to be amazed by how idiotic she is. He, somehow, enjoyed having an insight of her eccentric way of living.

He took his cuppa in his hand, one slender index finger around the handle, a thumb pressing hardly on top and three left behinds tucked beneath. Tea time was an occasion he found himself enjoying. The soothing breeze of the summer air passing his skin and the conversations he has with his mother were delightful. He do so wish his father would join them once in a while, yet the Ministry forbid him so. Gloom spread in his system and he found himself frowning accidentally, remembering the question a certain girl had implanted in his brain. Try as he might, he cannot seem to remove it from his head.

"Mother?"

His mother, a woman as lovely as her garden, hummed through the midst of sipping her own tea. He finds it relatively easier to ask her some questions he knew his father would deem so silly. The man, although purely intentioned, do not quite grasp the idea of being open with his emotions. But who's he to judge his own father when he, a wee boy himself, is already mortified to ask such bewildering question? Out of sheer panic, the words clogged in his throat and his mouth phrased an even more silly question, though less intimidating and personal.

"Do your plants talk to you?"

The older Malfoy settled her tea to it's saucer, two slim hands on either side of the caddy. Her expression changing from confusion, then to a knowing and an even more amused disposition.

"Have you been reading that odd magazine, Draco?"

He scrunched his forehead, slightly confused by her answer. Clearly, he was misunderstood. The girl who talked to him was odd, but she was no magazine.

"I did not read it anywhere. Why?"

"With all those strange nargles and imagination, I thought you were under the influence of the Lovegoods"

"Are they bad people?" It was ironic though, since some wizards shiver underneath their, especially his father's, glare. They shift uncomfortably and some even look as if they were on the verge of soiling their trousers. He was not blind, he knew people detest them. But inside the safety of their manor, he does not see why people would deem them bad. Quite proud and powerful sure, but they were not near evil.

"No, not even the slightest. Just.. Slightly unordinary. Quite a talented bunch if I would admit. It was tragic when they took their peculiar beliefs into an explosion of strangeness" He shrugged, bringing his attention back to the cup that's waiting to be noticed. He guessed that the girl was possibly an avid reader of the said magazine. Little did he know, he was reeking irony all over the place.

* * *

The sound of flowing water accompanied the silent swaying of his eyes. The words blurred upon the sheet but he mindlessly continued reading. He had no business in the gardens, but the cotton clouds and the warm blue of the skies had him remain outdoors.

Atleast, that was what he told himself.

His parents as well as his own self know that he was not much of an outdoor person. He rather like the soft mattress of his bed and the love seat nestling next to the huge window in his quarters. Perhaps, as hesitant as he was to admit, he just wanted to guard the hedges.

He doesn't need to explain himself further. He was too shocked and embarrassed to voice out his explanation.

"What is that you're reading?" two groups of golden strands fell to his line of eyesight and the smell of peach and some hint of dirt tickled his nostrils. His eyes glanced up to the suspicious intruder, not one hint of fright inside his system.

It wasn't that he would recognize her the first time he would see her, yet, he made an effort to scan her face. She was quite familiar, he thought. The light and dreamy texture of her voice was not new to him, though was still blurry and premature in his mind.

"How did you get in here? Who are you?" Two huge blue eyes examined his light ones. Somewhere in the silence that she breathed and he succumbed to, he mentally asked her why she must have such big and serene eyes. There was a strange comfort that ooze from them, as if they lure him to a never ending abyss of a sweet dream. He glared back, fearing that she might possibly read his thoughts.

"Did you already forget? Oh dear, the wrackspurts were quicker than I thought!" she simply stated, her huge dreamy eyes were worried. He was about to ask just what on earth did that mean when a click turned on in his head. Nobody has ever talked to him like that except for-

The girl was, amusingly, already out of his sight.

He glanced around and momentarily forgot about his book. Through the transparency of the fountain's flowing water, he saw a reflection of golden strands. The Luna girl was already at the pathway leading to the upper right side of the garden. He, for fearing the motive behind her visits, followed suit.

"You still haven't answered my question"

Her fingers glide on the innocent hedge by her side and surprisingly, or not at all when he came to think of it, her feet were lacking of protection. He frowned at her relaxed composure, seemingly alright with his glowering stare.

"You were expecting me" she halted and glanced upon her pale shoulder, her huge eyes sporting long and blonde lashes. He advanced to her position, the penetrating glare still in place, though Luna was sure she caught a mix of curiosity in them.

"I do so hope you're sleep walking, you are saying such weird things" he shook his head but her face was alight with a smile.

"It is a little too early for sleep and I would rather like to witness the peacocks with my eyes wide open." She tilted her head to look at him properly "So I have been called. But I am not wrong aren't I?"

He looked at her and sneered. There was an unsettling feeling in his stomach and he was sure it wasn't because of the tea.

He was glad. Better yet, relieved.

He waited for so long, approximately a week, but he was not used to waiting, it felt like years. Perhaps, he was all hyped with having a presence that doesn't bother him, with the exclusion of both his parents and his grandfather, and she was alright enough to hold a conversation.

"It's okay, you don't have to say it out loud"

By the end of their walk, he could see to her permanently dazed eyes the awe. She looked dainty and she ran as if she flew with invisible feathers underneath her feet. The peacocks, which Draco had a hard time getting acquainted with, craned their necks and looked at her with their usual grace.

"Beautiful" she advanced cautiously, her hand nearing the creature's beak.

Much to his dismay, the peacock leaned in to her touch, it's eyes fluttering. With such gesture, laughter pealed from her throat, her careful movements turned to excitement. There was a purple and blue with painted stars satchel around her little frame, and she pulled a quill and parchment from their place.

He spread himself to the dandelion patch a few walks away from the busy girl, his eyes were casted upon her. To his defense, there wasn't anything new to look at. She was a strange addition to the organized garden.

She stroked her quill messily, some ink landing on the shirt she's wearing. Although even if she was highly aware of the people around her, she seemed to be unaware of herself. Or she does not care at all.

She looked at her messy fingers and shrugged, continuing on the scribble she was working on.

"What are you doing?"

"I am making a picture, daddy certainly needs to see this"

After a long period of soft strokes and moving clouds, she raised her quill up to the air, her eyes inspecting her work.

She stood up once she agreed that her work met her satisfactory. With one hand clutching her parchment and dry quill, she wrapped her arms around her subject, offering her thank.

"Thank you, my mummy and daddy would be so happy. Maybe I could come back and bring them with me as well? Would you like that Miss Peacock?" The Peacock opened it's beak and responded with a cacophonous sound, one which Draco found extremely irritating and Luna, fascinating.

"Could you shut it up?" He asked, his eyes scrunched shut.

Behind his eyelids, a shadow towered over and eventually disappeared. He felt her body occupy the space next to him. "Don't be mad, she's just happy"

He opened one eye and sighed. For a minute, he forgot about her bizarreness. The impact caught him asking questions he would have stopped himself before.

"How could you know?"

"I could feel it"

She fell onto her back, adjusting next to him as if it was a routine they always do. He pushed his argument to the back of his head, there is no use to arguing with her, she answers in riddles and he does not have the energy to deal with it.

"You could be wrong, you know. What makes you so certain?"

 _But she wasn't wrong with him._

"I am not certain with a lot of things. But daddy says I should always have faith in them. That could be enough, don't you think?"

He allowed her humming to be the noise on his background. Why? He did not know, but he found himself not minding her living and breathing so close to him. He thought that it was just so awfully nice to have such comfort in territories he was entirely unfamiliar with. Just her presence and her willingness to talk to him were refreshing.

"I have this theory,"

"That isn't new to you is it?"

"I think Lucius Malfoy must have peacock blood" Her theory, so innocent and blunt, it choked him breathless and made him snort. He hasn't thought about that. More so to anyone for that matter. It wasn't that it was impossible cause it could be, and his father does have the poise and elegance peacocks were naturally equipped with. But-

He imagined his father with peacock feathers behind his back. Maybe, he could even have his luscious hair fan upon his head when he sleeps.

The mere thought of his father even wearing a peacock costume had him rolling upon the field, laughing hysterically.

The girl however, does not seem to get the humor of it all. She remained staring at him, her lips smiling but her eyes were bluntly confused.

"I am certain he doesn't have a pinch of peacock blood in him" He said through teary eyes. His stomach hurt and he could feel his throat itch, but it came from a happy catalyst. He knew it was a good kind of irritation.

"How would you know?"

"Oh, I'm sure. I'm Draco, his son"

She stared at him as his eyes went wide in shock. Thankfully, she did not tease him, that would certainly make the matters worse.

The summer wind blew softly against the stubborn hair that frame their faces, they sway in sync to the blown away dandelion seeds that float tenderly in the air. The girl watched, one hand cupping for her parchment and quilt from her satchel.

From the corner of his eyes, he watch her work again. She was far from the artists they hire to paint their portraits, but she looked so passionate and appreciative, he felt as if he was honored to watch her work. He knew, in the mere future, she would blossom, even to whatever skill she would want to. Her drive was shining all over the place.

"It's nice to meet you Draco, I'm Luna Lovegood"

On the side of her parchment, an innocent dandelion was sketched. Underneath it was a scribble of words, which when he stared closely, he saw their names listed next to each other. She smiled through her work, the same dreamy eyes were in their usual spark. Above the flower, she wrote a single word. One that he never knew he could be glad about. His father warned him to pick carefully, but so far, she was the only one who could hold innocent and laid back conversations with him.

 _Friends_.

He found himself wishing her parents had the decency enough to be purebloods.

* * *

 _ **After-**_ _Some point in 1993_

He chose to relax at the Black Lake with one pure intention. He wanted to egg the idiotic oaf further. Who even dare hurt him?

For Merlin's sake, he just wanted to make everyone know Potter wasn't that special. After all, his mother was the one who faced the dark lord so why did he get all her glory? He did nothing but breathe. _Typical._

He smirked to himself, hearing some footsteps coming his way. It was probably Potter and if he was lucky, the whole trio nonetheless. They were pissed and red as the Weasley. He found satisfaction in their stimulating hatred.

"Oh aren't you begging for it?" The footsteps halted and he waited. But the responses he was expecting weren't even close to a whisper. There wasn't any voice that linger in the air. Perhaps, out of awaken senses, he just imagined it.

It was all Potter's fault. If he was civilized with him, they could have ignored the mudblood and Weasley wouldn't be so humiliated all the time. Instead, he chose to be so stupid and selfish, he only thought of himself. He must've thought of the limelight, couldn't bare to think of sharing it to others. _Where is the surprise?_

"Stupid oaf, stupid Potter" He picked one smooth stone, caressing it's texture with his left hand. He took one sharp intake of breath, his nose flaring. Although the stone was held perfectly inside his palm, it wobbled slightly, showing the less used side of his left hand. He does well in writing with it, but some other things?

He missed Quidditch practice because of that stupid hippogriff and that failure of a professor.

Potter must've schemed it all along. He waited for Quidditch season to come just so he could slow down his progress. His right hand fidgeted inside the gauze, reacting to the anger boiling inside his body. "Wait 'til my father hears about this, you little prat"

"He would, wouldn't he?" The circling of his left fist stopped. He heard the voice plenty of times that he already knew it was her.

Luna jumped off of the big rock she grew used to sit around to. It somehow looked as if she was expecting him. Probably, it wouldn't be much of a surprise. Sometimes, he could feel her presence around the eerie forest, but he occasionally shrug them off, thinking he might be going a little bit mad. But it would make sense doesn't it? The forest has a lot of potential to be a barmy girl's territory.

"Sod off, I cannot deal with you right now" If he was talking to himself, he would have answered with the lines such as: _You never do, smart arse._ But instead, she was just standing next to him, watching as he threw his stone so roughly. She also witnessed the way the lake swallowed it way before it could even attempt to jump.

"There are certain things in life that you could not force, Draco" She picked a little stone below her, scratching it's top just because she is believes in a lot of things and she believes in gentleness.

Her stone, in contrast of his, glided upon the water, skipping three successful times before succumbing into the deep.

Out of his still ranging anger, he remained staring. Selfishly ignoring her. He probably looked like a lost cat she just found on the muggle streets, paws out and eyes untrusting, yet he found no words to insult her with. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew she was far from the person he was so furious about.

"Let go of that anger, it's not good for you" She touched both of his cheeks inside her warm palms, her dreamy eyes reaching for his refusing ones. "Breathe now, make it all go away"

He could feel the soothing aura of her presence wrap around his skin. Her eyes, the beacon of light that knew just how to calm him. Even in her soft demeanor, he was shushed out from his ranting. He felt as still as the lake behind her back, he remembered the warm breeze of summer 1988 and the way it hit his face. He remembered her blonde locks flowing alongside the seeds floating around them.

He closed his eyes, savoring the linger of her hands and the feeling of her presence near him. He let her in. He did not force her to.

"Luna, I-" he whispered, but his available hand reached for an absent witch.

He stood there with the lingering pressure of her hands, his fist clenched tightly as well as the knot in his stomach. He could have told her then. But he couldn't. Of all the things he skillfully force others and himself to do, he could not find the courage to ask for her forgiveness.

He reminded himself he was not allowed to be around her in the first place. To say sorry was another type of acceptance saying: " Welcome back!" When he successfully forced her to get out of his life.

No, there's no point of her forgiveness.

Inside his constricted right hand, there was a stone above a drawing of a dandelion. He took the smooth thing in his available hand and held onto it tightly. Seemingly thinking.

 _Luna, I-_

He could not allow her to work her way in again. Her gentle voice, her gentle eyes-

He threw the stone as hard as he could. Once again, it sunk faster than a blink of an eye. It's fate was mocking the dandelion that stared at him.

 _We're not friends, silly girl._

* * *

The chapter sort of wrote itself. But I do hope you liked it! Reviews are welcomed x


	3. 1990-1994

**Before** \- _November of 1990_

The snow descent slowly, joining the already thick white cover of the earth and so upon the noses of two blonde children. Wet spots linger just between the space of his eyes, drizzling down to the creases of his cheeks. He was cold and his lips were a tad red, but his hand held hers' and he pretends he was as warm as the hiding sun.

"It's fine Draco, you could stop holding my hand" The hand in his' shook and he felt a thunder wreck its way in that hand. So he stubbornly tighten his grip, her head lolling to look at his face. Yet he remained stiff necked, his gaze hardening to the gray sky.

Luna, for the past two years, grew to be somewhat.. pleasant to see. Sometimes, her smile leaves him stunned, shushing him down after he would deliver a really great sarcastic comment. She makes his stomach flip and it wasn't because of tummy ache.

He also developed this strange habit of holding her hand without any reasonable explanation at all. It was pathetic really, more so when his mother would look at him with such teasing expression, he felt as if it was better if the ground will drag him whole.

Even though he tried so hard to pretend that it was nothing, he knows too well that Luna was important to him. She can even be his best friend. He always seem to look forward to spending time with her, he doesn't care if he doesn't know half the creatures she is so fond about. Sometimes, he even catches up, finding himself saying them when he has nobody to blame for his mishaps.

"I prefer it this way. I like this." His voice was firm but there was a surprising soft relief that oozed through his confession. He watched her reaction in his peripheral vision, seeing her dainty face and her small smile. Her gentle features were melting alongside the droplets of snow that touch her tinted skin, the warmth of her eyes were enough to oppress the cold winter.

"Hum, it feels wonderful indeed. This might be a crush. I think you're my first crush, Draco" He felt her hand squeeze his' and he felt heat ran across the coldness of his cheeks.

She was always awkwardly honest and philosophically whimsical. If he was lucky, he could get his dosage of Luna's straightforward answers. Sometimes, her honesty has an extra mix of implications, her words always seem to have a lot of meanings. She often leaves people alone to find inspiration in her weird statements.

"I like you too Luna. Although you do realize that I only have you. Who knows what unfolds in Hogwarts. I have to meet pretty witches for certain. And you would be stuck here, waiting for me for an entire year"

He was a liar.

He was exposed to Pansy and that Daphne Greengrass a few times already. His father had his habit of arranging 'play dates' even if the bore was obvious in the children's eyes. Pureblood privileges or not, even the snotty kids like them need a break after all those frequent visits. It was not like they aren't going to see each other in Hogwarts.

"I could always write to you, you know. Draw you pictures of things you've missed"

"Are you not at all worried that I would eventually forget about you?"

The snow kept falling soundlessly and the two children were flat beneath the ground with hearts thumping in silence, both waiting for the other to make a sound. He waited for her odd expression to change. For once, needing reassurance from her.

"Don't worry, my mummy says that the things we lost would always find their way back to us in the end"

"What if I won't?"

"Oh but what if you do?"

He sighed, his face full of confusion and hesitance. There she was again with her confusing, philosophical statements. He could not allow her to cheer him up. How on earth would she even know how he would act? A lot can change in a year. More so if distance would continue to widen between them.

"I just have to put my faith in you and you just have to wait for me. It will be alright"

The thought of leaving her was a lot more unsettling than he could admit. At some point, he heard a finality in her voice. A promise that he knows people say once they are preparing the other for their exit. Luna Lovegood was sensing something he was quite happy to ignore.

She sat up from her position, her golden mane shielding away her face.

"You know what Draco? I think we'll get married someday," she said.

He breathed a few elaborated breaths and, quite slowly, sat upright. By the time his head met level to level with hers, her face searched for his', her eyes exploring the coldness of his orbs.

He challenged himself to stare back. He searched for a hint of malice in her eyes, any give away of her hidden intent. Instead, without any surprise, he just saw delight in them. The warmth still oozing from their depth. She was being as serious as she could possibly be.

Surprisingly, her silly thought made him smile. It was not much of a bad offer. No, not at all.

"Sounds like a plan" he replied.

He tolerates her and likes her enough to handle her for the rest of his years.

They would live in a castle as big as Hogwarts and undoubtably, he would let her eat all the pudding she wants. They would be happy, they would always hold hands.

As if she heard his thoughts, she took his hand inside hers, their cold palms wrapping to each other for warmth.

"Just promise me one thing though"

"What is it, Draco?"

There was a clog wrapped around the base of his throat. He swallowed. Hard. Desperate for her word.

"That you will- you will always believe in me no matter what"

Her smile grew and her eyes lit up.

 _Of course_

"And you won't be impatient with me in return?"

His smile was firm, but somewhere in the depth of his cold orbs, she saw his sincere reply.

 _Of course_.

Behind them, a stranger's footsteps were approaching, their light feet were struggling as every step lead them to sink in the stubborn thick snow. Draco turned around, surprised to see his mother, whose actions is always sharp and perfect, try and climb the infuriating pile of snow with her polished poise. Unfortunately, she was massively failing.

"You're just in time Missus Malfoy. Would you like to join us for a mug of hot cocoa? Mummy would be ecstatic to see you!"

He did not know if Luna have noticed his mother's odd state, but she regarded her as if everything was well.

Which made the older Malfoy clear her throat and incline her head the way she usually does.

"Oh my apologies Miss Lovegood, I am here to fetch my son. There is something urgent he must attend to, I do hope you understand" his mother glared at him, her firm and cold voice were in contrast of the worry in her eyes.

He snapped back from their winter wonderland and stood, glancing at the pocket watch he'd been carrying. The short golden arrow pointed at four, and the longer was on three. His eyes glared at the ticking time, to his mother, then to the girl staring back at him.

"Oh it is alright, the hot cocoa could wait" Luna assured them, her smile not faltering one bit.

His mother came close to Luna, a smile playing upon her face. Immediately, he felt a lump in his throat. It lingered an unease feeling for him. He could see the words written in his mother's eyes.

"Thank you dear Luna, you are indeed a lovely child"

The warmth in her hug and the slight appearance of sadness in her eyes were apparent. Those were idle hints of an exit. His mother was saying goodbye.

He walked wordlessly next to his mother, his eyes casted downward. A heavy feeling nestling in his chest.

"Draco? You would come back later won't you? A mug would be waiting"

He felt two pairs of eyes looking at him. He scrunched his brows, doomed with the feeling he was trying to ignore. He wished he was being paranoid, that he would be wrong. But his mother stayed still, the same blank expression upon her face. She was waiting for him to react. He expected her to reassure Luna that he would come running back, expected the delight in her eyes and the knowing smile on her lips.

Yet, nothing.

He turned warily, looking back at her.

She stood there with so much trust and faith, his chest ached. He felt guilty, though he was still uncertain of the cause.

"Soon, Luna"

"I'll be waiting then"

* * *

His father tapped his fingertips upon his rich wooden desk, his piercing eyes staring straight to his soul. He shifted awkwardly in his love seat, squirming from his father's interrogating aura.

"Where have you been Draco?"

He forced himself to stay put, his head a bit bowed. He doesn't have his mother to cover for him now. His father had made his point in not making his mother come and witness their chat. He already knows everything.

"Outside the property"

"And what business must it be? It seemed highly important to do it outside the manor"

He groaned inwardly, his head busy with exploring answers for his father's questions.

"I was admiring the winter, father"

"Why would you go to such place? You could admire the weather in your mother's garden. But why near Ottery St. Catchpole? Quite strange Draco"

He remembered her hand, pumping courage to his shivering one. Her reassuring smile easing him, slowing down the nervous tugging of his heart. The cold, slim and familiar fingers coiling on the spaces of his own, filling the gaps of his struggling fingers..

"The view from up there was really pretty, father"

"Ah, little Miss Lovegood is quite a lovely child, isn't she?," his father's eyes soften a little bit, as if he understood "Yet, she is not meant to be in our world, son"

His nervous hand turned limp upon his knees, his eyes full of selfish, child like sadness.

 _He remembered her hand_

"Why not? She is a pureblood"

"She wouldn't understand you boy. The Lovegoods? Weasleys? they are selfish scums. They ignored the possible extinction of our blood just for their desires. They are no less than the mudbloods. They're traitors I tell you. You do not want to get close to that little girl Draco, she will weaken you, drag you in her odd world. And when she's done, she'll leave Draco. She'll betray you. Just like her parents"

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he fought. He knew Luna. She will not do that to him. She's far from the traitor his father paints her to be. He met her family and all they did was to welcome him.

Quirky Xenophilius, wise Pandora..

They made him hot cocoa and shared him their hearts.

But his father had lived a couple of lives. Ever since he was younger, he had always admired the stories he told. The teachings and the values he put to heart, those that helped him survive.

He wanted so desperately to be just like him

Cunning, smart and handsome.

"I do not permit you being friends with that strange girl, do you understand?," He looked at the eyes of the man he looked up to, his grey eyes mirroring the same stubborn ones that belonged to his father. He shared him his reasons, he felt honored to hear them.

"It is for your own good"

He smiled sheepishly, feeling the wholesome power that circulated around his father's aura.

 _One day, I could be just like you_

"Very well, I am glad that you can follow my vision, my son. Miss Parkinson is available tomorrow. Suppose you could spend time with her. It could drain the unwanted feeling out from your system"

He nodded solemnly, his eyes looking outside the huge glass pane of his father's study. Across the piling trees and green ups and downs of hills, her home was lit up with yellow beaming light. Inside his mind, he could see her sitting down her father's stool, her hand wrapped around her mug and her eyes wandering back to the shape of their manor. Waiting.

His hot cocoa turned cold upon the Lovegood's desk. The waiting girl fell asleep not on her bed.

* * *

 **After** \- _December of 1994_

The snow descent peacefully outside the arches of the hallway, the chilly Christmas air carrying the light strands falling upon his forehead. Once outside, the bombarding music of the ball sounded soft, could pass as a lullaby even. He breathed, relinquishing the peace after the long while of being inside Pansy's vicious claws.

Outside the hallway, a pale figure was standing upon the thick blanket of snow, her back was what he could see. He thought of her as a ghost, though unfamiliar from the usual ones that lurk around Hogwarts.

Her pale arms opened themselves to her sides, barely noticeable green veins were alive behind her skin. She was very much alive. Yet one soft chuckle from her throat, and seemingly, she resembled a ghost he once knew.

She was the ghost he _once_ knew.

"Oi, Lovegood"

She stood upon her tiptoes and arched her neck, blonde hair cascading down and the fiery yellow embedded between her strands were beaming. She was clearly in her element, her huge eyes closed and lashes arching towards the deep sky.

He stood watching, mesmerized by the fragile ghost who danced along the winter as if she was the daughter of it. She twirled around the snow, her soft caresses were barely felt, she looked as if she was levitating.

"Oi, Lovegood" he tried again, shrugging off the traces of his confusion, as well as the lingering touch of Pansy's sharp nails.

She stopped midway from her attempt of making another twirl, her chest was awkwardly jutting out to the side, and he was certain she couldn't balance long enough to that one tiptoed foot that was keeping her grounded.

Instead, her eyes opened, and as if he broke a ritual, she was on her feet yet again.

"What are you doing?"

"Dancing"

"Are you daft? I could see that, obviously. Why are you outside your dormitories?"

She swayed pass across the distance between them, her yellow streaks stood out from the color of her blonde hair. She was literally glowing.

"For the party of course"

He glanced at the empty landscape behind her, his action dripping with sarcasm. Though with his insulting gesture, she made an effort to smile. _She did not change one bit._

"The Yule Ball is quite rare, Draco. I wanted to take a peak of it at least"

Except that she grew taller for the past couple of years. But still, she looked at him with tilted head and shining eyes. Her voice had a bit of a tone in it as well, enchanting and dreamy, quite hard to shrug off.

"In the open field with nothing but your night gown? What is that in your hair as well? Are you trying to attract foul beasts in the forest? Are you planning to get yourself killed?"

"I added some flowers and few drops of this certain sweet smelling potion from Professor Snape's perfume cupboard into my hair soap, but it turned some of my strands a deep shade of yellow. It looked good in the dark, and I quite like being in the winter snow. You must know that Draco, you're _my_ friend"

Of course, of course he knows. He sought for her since the day he kicked her out of his life. He hid behind the hedges of his house, peeking through windows to scan far away mountains. Somewhere in their smoothness he saw her smile, upon the beaming moon he felt the gentle caress of her hand.

"I am _not_ your friend" he said defensively.

Guilt. Guilt travelled, piling itself around his system until it becomes sour heartburns. Her eyebrows knitted themselves on the middle, her eyes drifting him back to the memory of the same ones staring back at him. Her cheeks wet and mouth slightly opened.

He missed her.

"You still are," her voice was above a whisper "to me"

Her hair was still glowing, wrapping her in a yellow embrace. It was amazing how she still gets away whole and alive from all her impossible beliefs. Despite the years far apart and the tragic things that had happened to her all alone, she remained the eccentric little Luna Lovegood who isn't afraid of being herself.

Pansy and Daphne were not like Luna. Perhaps, nobody could be just like her.

"Dance with me, Draco?"

 _for old times' sake?_

She held his hand, her cold fingers enclosed to his warm palm. He let her lead him to her very own ball, the two of them below the vast night sky. She was the moon, he was the dragon.

The soft murmurs of music tumbled in his eardrums and he watched her as she twirl through the thick snow.

Once again, her giggles pealed from her lungs. Whatever she had found amusing left him smiling slightly. His hand that she left felt quite odd. He was given the taste of what he once so held dearly. Everything has changed. The impulse of wanting to take her hand back was more detailed. He understood it better.

The thirst of something familiar

He swallowed hard.

He was in no position for such thing. He already has Pansy.

"You look handsome" She sat next to him to the cold ground, stating one fact he knew. Her hand was a pinky away from his', just a nudge away..

 _But he's different now_

Even if she did not grasp the idea of change, it did not mean he could not. So did his leaving her.. Just because she was strange and nice and his only, toleratable friend doesn't mean he has to stay.

And just because she's nice and strange doesn't mean she has no right to be angry of him.

It was either cruel or nice of her. He doesn't know which it was.

"Stop it Lovegood" He stood up abruptly, catching her off guard. He glared at her through loosen strands, his eyes were accusing. "Don't play dumb with me"

"No, I am not-"

"Stop it. You are no longer allowed in my life alright? Stop your little games at once, I've had enough of you Lovegood"

Perhaps she staged his guilt. It is only reasonable if she was toying with him. Lovegood was a very intelligent girl, she knew all about her powerful hand and used that weakness against him. He was bond to suffer from his misdeed.

What other greater punishment than guilt?

He turned so fast, he successfully dodged the confused and slightly sad look upon her face.

The snow covered his tracks and soon, like him, he left her all alone. She sat upon her cold ground, transfixed and deep in thoughts regarding the words he viciously accused her of. But he did not care. He wouldn't let her in again. She was gentle and she was deadly.

A soft glimmer of glitter and pink opened the huge doors of the Ball and suddenly a stumbling Pansy Parkinson trodden to his way, her eyes slightly hooded and her feet were clumsy.

He offered his hand to the intoxicated witch, she basically threw herself to him.

"Oh Drakie, I've been looking evr'where, thought you left!" she buried her face to his robes, her emotions were all over the place.

He grimaced at her sudden contact, her hands were gripping his collars so tightly, she might rip them off.

"Let's go alright? Couldn't let you risk our image, you'll embarrass the both of us"

"Are you alright Pansy? Perhaps you need a potion for your intoxication?"

"Nobody asked for your opinion Loony. I feel so sorry for you Drakie, ending up having to deal with this freak"

He sneered, quite annoyed though confused on whoever to vent it over. He felt Luna's eyes glance at him, felt the worry flicker in her eyes. He assumed it was for the Slytherin who got drunk because of a few mugs of butterbeer. He dragged Pansy off of the girl he does not have the willpower to face. The Slytherin witch's wistful face scowled as she outwardly grimaced, claiming that his movements was too fast for her to handle. He however, pulled her more carelessly, throwing Pansy all his frustration.

"That Loony. It's not fair she's prettier than me"

Behind him, he heard her soft humming and he swore she must be dancing in her own world again. He could see her lashes, resting to her cheeks, and her feet, they were light and carefree. In contrast of her special glow, the girl slung dead and too exhausted on him tried so hard.

He touched her hand, momentarily curious. In Pansy's state, it was a miracle that she still registered it. She smiled, one that she continuously use just for him. However, he pulled back as quick as how the thought occurred. Her hand smelt like roses, and he was still accustomed of peach and a hint of dirt. He was still used of comfort and soft flesh squeezing his' in moments he needed it the most. He was still used of Luna's realness.

Even if he knows and tries not to.

Definitely, nobody could be like her.

He couldn't help but to nod silently from Pansy's personal confession.

Beneath the white covered grounds and beaming moon, a girl twirled upon the world. He on the other side, had his thoughts running back and forth. He could not do anything but to wait for it to just stop.


	4. 1990-1995

**Before-** _September of 1990_

Draco stared frowning at the broomstick lying upon the grass. His opened palm was directed to the limp wood, waiting for it to command what he says. However, he was getting really impatient. It was already past two in the afternoon and he had been trying to activate the broom for the past thirty minutes already. Still, so far, it was far from his hand.

"Up"

His command, although forced and powerful, was limp to the broom. It shook quietly, but it always failed to rise from the ground.

"Have some connection with it Draco, maybe it just needs a little coaxing," the girl with huge odd looking spectacles and wild hair said. It might be extremely bizarre to follow her suggestion, seeing that she looked as if she was not from their world- nonetheless from earth, but he ushered her to show off. "I would like to see you try then, if it looked so easy for you," they were friends for quite a while now, and he was still strangely alive.

The girl smiled despite the heavy specs that might be awfully discomforting to wear. Her little feet carried her to his station, the grass cuts seem to shy willingly as her toes meet them.

"I think you don't need to force it Draco, you just have to be comfortable with it." Her hand slid to his strained one, her nimble fingers applying pressure to his muscles. He glanced sideways to her face, his eyes searching for hers'. Despite the huge glasses upon her nose, he saw the eyes behind it and they were bright and encouraging, egging him to try again. Gentle, they said. Believe.

He sighed and let her touch connect to him as if a thread that binds them together. From the nerves of his hand, her energy crept up to his puzzled brain. Her power massaging the tensed muscles to relaxation.

Up.

Bear with me.

" _Please_." His voice lowered a tone gentler, the word felt foreign in his mouth. Luna gently lets go of his hand and watched him with interest, not an ounce of worry in her seemingly permanent placid face. Besides the calmness of his voice, his hand tilted up, as if offering a hand to a troubled soul. He felt submissive, quite out of his element.

Slowly, the broom lift itself from the ground, shaking, trembling with the newfound power that ushered them to life.

Draco's smile stretched wide, his heart leaping with joy. In comparison of his heart, the girl also jumped, clapping both of her hands as she felt excited for her best friend.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Lets ride it then"

"Are you planning on getting us both killed?" He looked at her ad if bewildered. Immediately, he grasped the broom tightly, holding it against him for the fear that she might grab it from him and suddenly whisk away.

"You said you haven't tried flying it more than hips high and I think this is an opportunity to try. If not now, then when would that be?"

"That's non of your business Luna-"

"But your thinking about it Draco, what's holding you back?" She glanced at his flexing hands. One look from his face, he knows she already had the clue for her question. He squirmed from her scrutiny, feeling submissive and uncharacteristically insecure.

"Even better reason to go on," she said, as if he already voiced out his reason "there's not a thing to be ashamed off Draco! I for one do not know how to swim. I would try to jump in your lake someday. Probably tomorrow, I am still uncertain. It depends upon the creatures lurking in it, if they would have me that is."

"If we both die, just remember I told you so"

"Ok point taken Draco. Though we would not die just yet"

"How could you be so sure?"

"Just cause"

"Just cause?"

"Yes"

He groaned but he found himself surrendering to her suggestion anyway.

It was probably to shut her up.

Yes.

Okay.

He slung himself to the handle, grabbing the top with both hands. Luna, who's eyes were being hidden by her ridiculous accessory, looked more excited and more than ready for the ride.

She stopped mid step as she stared at him.

"What?"

"I would like to sit in front Draco"

"Why?"

"I'm afraid you have to wait"

He rolled his eyes and scooted over, presenting her the top half of the broomstick. She happily obliged, the thick glasses of the specs she's wearing glistened with the sun's rays.

As if on reverse position, Luna was the one who's hands were wrapped on the handle this time.

"Wait for what?"

"Good afternoon Mister Malfoy, welcome to the fear management class with your professor, miss Luna Lovegood. Now, please warm up this spectacles for me and see with your ears open wide alright?" Just when she placed the huge eyewear to his eyes, his whole surroundings went pinkish in hue. Also, the things scattered around such as the trees and the bushes turned quite blurry, swirling with bluish aura or probably with energy.

"How in Merlin's pants can you see in this? Luna what are you-"

Luna stomped her foot down and immediately, the broom tilted and carried them off of the ground. Out of sheer panic and remembering just who's handling the broom, he pushed his arms hurriedly on both her sides, grasping the hint of wood between her tummy and her hands.

The spectacles stayed glued upon his face. As heavy as it looked, it was quite comfortable atop the nose and ears, it was incredibly soft and light weight.

Though still, he was having such trouble operating the broom. All he sees were strands of hair and blue particles.

A rush of soft wind blew around his face, caressing him into a cold embrace. He could already feel that his feet was nowhere near the ground and expectingly, he panicked.

"What now Draco? I haven't tried riding a broomstick before you know"

"What-what now? I cannot see with this bloody thing! Oh bloody bullocks, we're actually going to die"

"Not when you're going to save us from this. Hmm, yes. You will, just listen to my directions okay?"

They were really going to die weren't they? Directions plus dreamy Luna Lovegood plus panicking Draco is not a good formula. His father would kill him double dead if he'll find his death was a result of his reckless actions. Oh why on earth did he even let her lead him to that kind of trap?

He tightened his grip around the broom. He feared that if he loosened them, his slippery palms would slip and he'll fall to his death. His heart was beating really fast, probably the most it ever did. He did not care if Luna could feel his panic right away, his main goal was to manage living through such risky stunt.

Strangely, Luna had the nerve to raise both of her hands off of the handle and lead them to his shivering ones. It was clear that she was not affected by their situation at all. He wouldn't even be surprised if she could stand and perform gymnastics as he would eventually die out of sheer panic.

He screamed once her hands moved. The broom temporarily went shaky and their speed doubled. As soon as the speed turned to a dramatic change, the broom tilted down, rotating them as they both feel their heads hanging down and hair strands standing.

Draco felt Luna's hands tighten their grip against his, and instinctively, his arms squeezed her inside, protecting her from the possibility of falling. Questions be damned, they needed not to let one of them fall.

Luna, with all the might inside her system, put all her strength to her side in an attempt to shift them back to their place. "Draco-" he obliged without instructions, he edged as well, bobbing to their right as the broom flipped.

"Luna-"

"Shift left, turn left now, Draco"

He felt leaves slap across his cheek the moment he swerved sharply. They stung quite a little bit, but the panicky feeling inside his chest went numb and an adrenaline rush replaced it instead.

Thankfully, as a substitute to his sensitive skin, their direction and the leaves decided to change their victim and lapped with the violent rush of air that the two children caused. Somewhere in the far distance, he felt laughters pealing. Judging by his scratching throat, the sounds actually came from his heaving chest; the heart inside his chambers was beating loudly in his ears as well.

"Now, right. Yes, another one." The girl in front of him was still composed. Oddly enough, her voice did not falter one bit. Not even when they almost gotten themselves killed. She still continued giving him directions, though as to where? He does not know. Somewhere inside his lurking thoughts, his inner dialogue answered him about how much he trusts Luna Lovegood.

And it was probably right.

What harm would that lead anyway? Luna was purely good, sometimes he felt as if he was selfish to chain her to him.

He felt as if he trapped her to him.

His surroundings turned purely pink, no shade of blue was in sight.

"I would take that off of you now" She shifted against him, her eyes shining in sparkling blue against all the pink hue surrounding him. He was speechless, finding nothing to say to her. But she seemed to be not baffled by his silence though, she in return, removed her troubling eyewear from his vision.

Once removed, he stared at her face. It was probably the adrenaline that pumped him to feel as if his heart was racing as her smile stretched itself. It was the very first time he felt that shift of rise and fall, near to death experience after all; his head must've been wracked too hard.

He removed his gaze and stared at the sky filled of low clouds. His mouth widen and Luna chuckled with his reaction. The sky cottons were terribly low, he felt as if he could touch them if he raised his hand. Underneath them, just a few inches below their feet was a huge calm lake, their pale skin illuminating from the little light shining randomly against its body.

He cannot reach the puffs and his feet were still dry, but he felt surreal though.

"Congratulations Draco. I believe we temporarily died and went to Heaven. This is not much of a bad aftermath isn't it?" She shifted as well, her feet were dangling underneath the broomstick. He chuckled back, his words were stuck, locked in his vocabularies for a moment.

"Do not jump yet Luna"

"No, I am afraid we have dosed ourselves with too much Heaven for now"

Her hand squeezed his' and he squeezed back. The thread that looped its way around their hands tightened. He could feel her much closer to him. If it was possible, he felt as if he could trust her with anything. It was dangerous, he was taught not to depend on someone, but Luna was different. She was his friend, and she made it pass the point that she could even risk her life just to help him face his fear.

"Luna? Thank you"

"What for?"

"Don't push it"

* * *

 **After** \- _June of 1996_

The room was quiet. Much so that he could feel his ragged breathing bounce to the intrigued walls. It was also huge, just a shy away from the Great Hall's spacious capacity.

He did not know how he successfully entered it, knowing it was supposedly saint Potter's little room of nonsense. Yet, he did. He ushered himself in, demanding entrance to some place, anywhere he could sulk in just to finally allow himself to let loose his restrain.

It was quiet, except for the selfish beating of his heart. He assumed he was alone.

Yes. He is, isn't he?

His fist clenched his wand, his knuckles turning sharp and defined against his skin.

When he received the letter from his mother, anger aroused in his system. He did not care if Potter was mourning. How could people even support such a selfish boy? Just because he was the golden favorite did not mean he was all holy. Quite a biased overrated hypocrite, that he is. He always leave Draco with humiliation. He digs the boy's grave with the hands of manipulated fools for shovels. He ruined his life. As well as his family's. His poor, poor mother.

The room casted a looming shadow, eating half of the room with it's ferocious darkness.

He stood still in his spot, his eyes indescribable with the searing hot pain that threatens to leave. He only stared, his gaze as vicious as his teeth that were clashing to one another. He was 'not' sad. He wanted something to hurt. He wanted to blame anything, destroy something.

It was unfair. It was not right for him to feel such- such weakness.

From behind him, a small sound emitting from heavy doors closing could be heard, though still ignored by the ringing shells of his tinted ears. It was not that he was distracted, he grew up being cautious after all. But he, however, is a liar, delusional, body filled with pride no matter what angle. He once again, ran away from what was truly handed to him by reality that he tries so hard to avoid. That he could honestly want to change.

A petite and pale blonde Ravenclaw stood awaiting for his reaction. Her arms, her fragile little limbs were steadied to the the direction of his frame, as if deciding- uncertain. She was sad, terribly sad and quite scared, scared of probably what he was capable of doing. She was no idiot, she knew there was something he must've felt when he found out she was there. He was sad. He was angry. And so she became cautious, her movements were planned, if it was possible, quite softer than her usual lightweight actions.

As if trapped in a cage long forgotten by the world, a drench of fresh air was bewildering. A caveman alarmed and accusing.

Slow, steady, questionable hands touched the cold flesh of his arms. Like a functioning heart, the room throb one tug, lightening the lonely room. Though as quick as it came, it vanished. His eyes turned into slits and his anger stilled. He knows that touch too well.

He swat her hands away, his movements too sharp, there was a light snap that triggered the two connected bones in his surprised elbows.

Her hands backed away, halting to the space between them. There was a chord that snapped, their connection cut. The distance became somewhat wider and his thoughts were louder.

"Draco" His name upon her persuasive tongue left a bitter scent in the air. All the suppressed accusations were piling up upon his own sharp one.

He did not bugger, his eyes stayed as the light and shadow fought in the vast area in front of them.

"Please speak to me." She looked as if she was hurt. Though probably, Potter trained her to look so vulnerable. He scoffed mockingly, the wand in his hand was burning with his restrain.

He raised the wand in his hand and flicked it to a form that sharply resembled incendio. The red hot anger landed on the innocent pillar close to him. He watched as he ignored the searing warmth surrounding it.

She uttered his name again. Her melodic, soft little voice joining the crackling of fire that danced with the smoke. The fire wrapped her pale silhouette with a harsh glow, her ethereal being looked aloof. It seemed unreal. She seemed to look like the embodiment of deception.

Dainty.

Deadly.

"What do you want Lovegood?," he spatted before muttering the same incantation to the other pillar.

"You need me, Draco. Is that not what this room is? To provide for you?"

Fire bombarded the cold, penetrating silence. It was as if it was in sync with the hidden tugs inside his chest, crackling and flowing like a beating heart. Despite the overwhelming atmosphere and the perspiration that began to formulate on his pores, he flinched more profoundly when he felt her presence, her strong lingering gentleness, come closer.

"Why would I need you?"

"Perhaps, you need a friend?"

He scoffed. Quite ironic.

"I get on just fine without that"

"It gets a little messy trying to carry laundry with just two arms"

"House elves can do better than, I don't know, lousy traitors"

"Traitors you say? Though why would you lend something private to a traitor?"

Because they are angels who, for a few glances and shared conversations, made you feel something. They lingered far enough in your life, you would somehow think you can be comfortable with them. Yet, it turned out, you do not mean a single dime, or a dust to such glorious creatures.

' _She would leave you just when you thought she won't'_

"Because you trusted them once. Such a foolish choice" His father was right. He knew about people like her. Of course she would grow tired of him, why on earth would she stay and act as if she was his conscience if he left that same room he locked her in? If he was in her place, he would do the same thing.

Still..

The fire was thrashing all around the untouchable pillar, demanding and angry.

They took his father.

He woke up in the midst of a comfortable dream. He was not that little boy who takes comfort in loneliness anymore. He was forced to live in it, with no keys to the locks that filled all around the dark and cold chamber.

"Draco-"

She insisted once again.

"Stop this Lovegood"

"Draco-"

Against the warmth of the fierce flames, he shivered from the cold liquid that left his eyes. He felt nervous, drenched to the core; cold water was poured to his cowering frame. He was unprepared, but he was left alone to deal with all of it.

He knows she knows. If she was smart enough, she could have left him then, could have walked away from the dirt her own friends dug for that obnoxious boy from Slytherin. Instead, she insisted. Her own hand found its way in the tight mess of the one that's holding his wand.

The two sides of the thread snapped, their connection touched faintly. The fire was blazing in front of them and his mind clicked.

"You call yourself a friend," his voice was hoarse and his face must've been in the middle ground of sadness and condemnation "and yet you helped 'him'"

His wand tumbled from his hand, rolling like a helpless stick being kicked by an oblivious foot. Lovegood caught up with it and kneeled just to pick the weak wood with her hands.

"Go on, fight me like how Potter showed you. Bet your little boy friend would be so ecstatic when he finds out you'd do the same with the death eater's son. Bet you'd be happy to retell him about how weak and unreliable he was, won't you? That would be quite a snog to look forward to"

Somewhere in that middle ground, the night sky of logical reasoning whispered. He knows he has no right to accuse her of such thing. He ended their friendship after all. Yet in the spun of the moment he cannot blame anybody but her. It was incredibly hard not to blame himself when his father had already warned him about her but some force still cloths her with the younger version of herself's earnest quality.

"I won't do that to you, Draco. I am your friend. Still. Always"

There are certain things that need to be done

Even if it means it has to hurt you

Sacrifices

Did he not do it enough?

"I am sorry, Draco"

Her arms around him. One innocent wand behind his back, ready to aim. Two pillars set on both sides of them, fiery and vicious. He could push them along with the downfall that erupted in his body. He was strapped to the pillars of anger and blame he relinquish himself in. She was there, his father painted her to be treacherous. But he came running back to the comfort he was so afraid to lean on. She was comfort, she was his heroine.

"Why must you meddle in? Why must you make me feel this?"

She always looked as if she meant every single thing she does and says.

She did worse, much worse than what Potter did to him.

She made him trust her. And in a way, she's making him feel so confused for still believing, for still needing her.

His poor father. Her new, contrasting friends.

She let go without the curse leaving from her mouth, or the tip of his wand behind his back. Instead, his wand was back inside his fist, her cold hand wrapped around it.

"There's no such thing as right and wrong in loyalty, Lovegood. You've picked your bed, go lie in it."

He was hardened like a warrior who only had his pride left for him. It was clear upon her chapped lips and faint scratches that she took a path much further than his. Maybe she was at the pinpoint of her faith in him. He made it look as if he does not intend to wait for her after all.

If that was to happen, then so be it.

He does not need her.

He does not care.

He hates her.

He should.

He left her watching him as he walk out of the destruction he made and she partially began. His dangerous Delilah glued to the ruins of their rendezvous. Although he was fully awoke, he was blinded by the clouds of deception.

He found himself asking of whom it was exactly from.

"You always wanted to make him proud. He is, I think"

Her voice, a soft linger to the air, a sting in the cages of his chest.

The fog became thick at the top of his head. Even though the room was closed, the shadows and her words lingered, barely touching him, but swallowing him with mocking giggles. The darkness, though he became comfortable of, looked aloof without a single moon appearing from it.

* * *

How was it? My apologies for the grammatical errors and misspelled words. Please do leave a review :)


	5. 1988-1996

**_Before- Autumn of 1988_**

Inside the beloved garden of the aristocratic family, a peculiar sight unfolded upon the balcony. From the distance, the two pair of blondes looked contrasting. One was sitting stiffly though sophisticated on her seat, and the other was leaning upon the table, feet swinging without any footwear, oblivious with the cowering essence of the Malfoy name.

Though, up close, they both looked out of place from their surroundings. The older being too much, the younger being too little. Their faces, both sporting smiles and soft glowing eyes. The scenario looked tranquil, Luna Lovegood could be a proper pureblood daughter from the distance he's staring at.

As he got closer, his new friend glanced over his mother's shoulder and waved her little hand enthusiastically. He gave her a blunt confused glare. He was unaware she'd come. Not when it was at an odd hour in the afternoon. You might think he has been, at least, used to her randomness by now. But he thinks she'd always catch him off guard.

"Good afternoon Draco"

"Why are you here?"

He reached the gazebo before she replied. She was anticipating to see his reaction much clearer.

"We'll watch the whole world today"

He stared at her, disbelieved, then looked at his mother, who did nothing but watch as his peculiar friend gouge his inner struggle. It seemed that she wouldn't rescue him from Luna Lovegood's trap.

"It is rude to turn down such a lovely girl such as Miss Lovegood" His glare hardened, the foot upon the ground begging to stomp. Narcissa, however, only lifted her cuppa, sipping innocently on her lid as if she did not just let her own son sign his sanity card goodbye.

"And how would we even do that?" He crossed his arms in a defensive position. His eyes were lowered, directed to the crown of her golden head, long locks twirling in the air. She was knotting, quite randomly, the purple laces of her white, but were too worn out, they now looked dirty white, rubber shoes.

Her eyes were the first to rise, followed by her dangling locks, then her hips and legs.

"With our eyes closed of course" She gave him an honest smile, her own set of young teeth were small and flashing. He stared at her for a while, as if asking if she's sane.

"Father won't allow me to go for certain" Being acquainted with Luna Lovegood will cost him his rationality.

"That is why I am giving you a chance to go, love." His mother reasoned, still choosing to brush Draco's persistent refusal. "I know how much you've missed Miss Lovegood. That was a long week, wasn't it? And I've had enough of you moping around, waiting for her to come back. Surely love, you dreaded for this, hum?"

Luna giggled and he almost swore the heat that rose on his cheeks could boil the kettle upon the table.

"Meh, I've had the time of my life" he glared, almost convincingly, yet his feet were directed away from her position, a sign that he really dreads for the humiliation to stop. Narcissa saw his agitation, then was glad the father of her darling child was not around to see such slip. He had been quite on edge without his charming little friend for that one long week, barely letting himself experience what it was like to be a young boy, she thought it would be nice to finally see him let loose for a moment.

She truly loves it when the golden haired girl whisks her son away. Life as a pureblood is hard. Yet, being a Malfoy is tougher. She will tend him to be the perfect man, but not for now. She couldn't steal such sun from him.

"Goodness Draco, go now, take it as a form of duty, my dear" Her brows thinned the space that separates them. Yet though, her icy voice was trailed with a sense of order, something Draco had found relevant as she hardly use such tone.

"Fine, fine," he scoffed, "this better be good, Luna"

Luna's untamed mane shone by the sun's rays as she tilts her head. Her bright blue eyes looked daze staring at him and he almost swore he wore the funniest face for his curiosity and shock.

"Why are you looking at me funnily?"

She though, only cleared her throat then bowed dramatically, her hair strands meeting the ground, shielding away her dirty shoes.

"I'm thanking the wrackspurts"

Draco glanced back at his mother with a horrified expression, "what for?"

"They left your head willingly. Daddy said that's quite a rare occurrence. They must've feasted on your head for far too long, you know"

"Mother, I believe you can still stop me from leaving" Narcissa only smiled, almost nearing to a grin. Even at home, she still guards herself as to how to act and Lucius expected such from his one and only son as well. Inwardly, she envied the childhood Luna Lovegood was experiencing, to be able to act her age, to have the say to what she wanted for her own future. How Narcissa knows she'd give up alot of things just for Draco to have such freedom.

But that wasn't possible, yet still, she's thankful for the little angel that provided it for them.

Because even though she'd wish and wish of her heart's desires, Draco Malfoy was still destined to follow his father's footsteps.

"Father will not hear about this, alright Luna?"

As the two precious children leave the Malfoy manor, she cannot help but to sigh in defeat. When they grow into their own principles, would they remain as to how they are now? With no prejudices to worry, no drop of blood to honor whole-heartedly?

Narcissa can only hope.

* * *

The blue skies stretch at the top of his head, more than tens, probably already millions and millions, of soft cottony clouds wrapped the whole earth with gentleness, but it wasn't the case at all, Draco thought. His father was still frigid, even after seeing the light of the clouds, and probably, his silly, fluffy hearted friend, Luna Lovegood.

"Well?" she turned back to him, the excitement clear to her soft and odd features.

"I leave the manor when we go buy things and to attend parties and play with Parkinson and Greengrass, you know" He couldn't see what was the fuss about. She might've thought he doesn't go outside at all, but he does, really. He even spends his time in much prettier places than her chosen venue, like the parties Mrs. Zabini throws at their manor. The boy there was obnoxious but he really liked the set up for their garden.

"Are they your friends? They have such peculiar names. Greengrass is a mouthful, do you call them Green, instead? Grass is odd but I like it" She tiptoed from her feet to cross the small brooke, her long shoe laces dipping to the stream.

He might've cringed to her carefree actions if he wasn't too busy laughing. Daphne would ban him and will never want to see him again if he'd call her Grass.

That wasn't such a bad idea.

"No, those are their last names, Luna"

If she was him, he might've grew extremely red from the embarrassment. But she only shrugged and nodded, accepting his explanation as though he had not made her look silly.

They crossed the brooke and he wore a big smirk on his face because he did not get any water on his clothes. Father would be so proud- well, if he'll know, which he won't.

"Am I not your friend then, Draco?"

He paused for a moment, was to say she has to stop being silly but decided not to. She was the only companion he's secretly glad to have. His mother was not exaggerating when she said he was whole heartedly waiting for her to show up. He felt his cheeks grow hot as though he would confess something icky to her.

"Why'd you ask?"

"Because you call me Luna, instead of Lovegood"

"You are my friend, Luna Lovegood"

She stared at him and slowly, her mouth rises in a phase until almost all of her teeth were shown. He saw the way her eyes light up, so earnestly, he was so glad that he caused it.

"I am so happy, Draco Malfoy," he was about to make an indifferent retort when she grabbed his hand in her smaller one and yanked, "let's go, hurry, run"

For a girl that moves in feather like actions, she successfully had him running along with her. In his mind, he tried to defend his pride, explaining that he was caught off guard and well, he wanted to give in to what she wanted, but she truly whisked him away with her.

They ran with wet grass slightly dampening their shoes. If he was to think of that moment, he'd really throw a fit, for it was earth, soil, sticking to his brand new pair. His father will probably get angry by that. He'll probably know. But he strangely couldn't rationalize, his lungs were like fire and his nose was heaving air in and out frantically. He was like a dragon, it seems. Draco the Dragon. How fitting.

He removed her hand off of him and she complied with a knowing grin on her face. He stretched his arms to the side and looked up at the sky, the clouds were leaving him one by one but they never ran out. If he raised his hands, he swore he could catch them, but he was flying, and he wouldn't want to fall if he took his arms away from their flaring.

"I must be a dragon, I am a dragon, Luna look, I must be flying" Where did that come from, he didn't know. But his eyes were bewildered, looking back at toothy grin was still in place but he swore they widened much bigger, if that was possible.

"It gets better, close your eyes, Draco" Luna looked pretty running alongside him, her long hair was waving with the wind and her face was bare and pink. He furrowed his brows in confusion but she only nodded encouragingly and took his hand. "I'm here"

The world became dark and there was no blue skies or endless clouds. He was still running and only a warm hand inside his was comforting him, telling him not to stop. The air around him pass by his face and he suddenly became more aware of his own breathing and the sound of grass meeting his shoes.

"Luna? Where are you?" It was odd knowing he could take a peak, but he feared he would lose the comfort her hand was giving if he'll make her feel as if he does not trust her. So he continued on. Thankfully, he's still unharmed.

"I'm here, Draco" Her hand, the source of his trust, squeezed his to a halt. Slowly, she lets him go, only to feel her touch upon his shoulders. "Let's lay on this cloud" she said.

"What cloud?" He asked, not understanding how it could be possible, but still obliged.

He slowly brought himself down. Without seeing where they are, he can only register softness. They must be upon a patch, though he'd let Luna carry on just cause she wanted to.

"Can't you see me dragon? I'm hiding behind the clouds" Her voice was in their usual melodic state, drawing him in with her soft tone. "It's quite dark in here isn't it? But you'd still find me" Behind his eyes, he was trying to locate her. She must be there somewhere. He can feel her staring back, never judging, just guiding. Within the dark, he knows she's there to look after him.

"You're the moon aren't you?"

* * *

 ** _After-1996_**

He couldn't do it.

He couldn't do it.

What is he to do with his sorry arse self?

He's a monster.

He's a coward.

He's afraid

and he can't fix the damned thing right.

It was so dark.

Soon enough, he'll follow next.

He fixed his tie one too many times. His hand was itching, his skin was burning. His eyes were tired but he was crying.

He felt it. Against his thumb, there were faint tugs from the bird's neck. For a moment it lived, then the next, it was still.

It was frigid and cold because he killed it. Much like what the dark lord will do to him soon. Is there even any life left to waste?

After failing the test, he did not know what to do with himself. He thought of his father, thought of the Malfoy name, thought of the many years spent practicing how to honor their pure blood, thought of his mother, his impending death. He spent his days trying to prove Potter, that old biased Headmaster, the dark lord, he was so much more than the golden boy, than their opinions, it turned out, all was in vain.

His own grave was already waiting for him the moment his own father disappointed the dark lord. He was born to die. But first, he really had to fail. He has to taste the poison and feel it darken his blood before life will drain him dry.

"Draco?" A soft voice against the dark. He couldn't see, couldn't concentrate properly. All was blurry and his eyes were already giving up, but he couldn't sleep, couldn't eat. He's alone.

He killed the damn bird.

Soft footsteps hurried to meet him. He felt a warm hand grabbing his malicious one. It was his hand that held the bird. The hand that felt its pulse. Inside his palm there was once a body full of warm flesh. From the past five years of his life, he saw that bird with its heart beating, its eyes flashing with so much life.

"Draco?"

It was so trusting when he took it from its home.

He yanked his hand away form hers. Against the dark, he could feel her eyes watching him. She was probably judging but he does not have the energy to scare her off. He was already exposed. She knew. Of course, she always seem to know. It must be the last straw for her , to see that the boy she once knew of was no longer him.

In his stead was a killer and a coward. Who was he trying to kid? He's doing this not because he can. But because he's scared of his fate. He was a pawn of this silly game and all the while he thought it was a privilege. Who is he anyway? He's just Draco Malfoy.

The boy

with the name.

His knees weakened, his patellae meeting the dirt, the soil. Inside his chest, something broke. As if a bird's hum, it throbbed and settled uneasily on his ribcage, trying to break away. He was deranged and pitiful, his innocence rotting on the dirty ground.

Angry tears continue to fall so helplessly from his eyes, he couldn't see clearly, yet it wasn't necessary to brush them off, he was already too blind. The bird inside his chest roared, demanding release, he couldn't help but let its screams echo and leave.

Flying aves flew away from trees, sensing his agony and deciding not to offer him any form of their freedom. He watched, his head inclined as they soar. The evening was vanilla twilight, yet still everything was too dark. Whenever he closes his eyes, it gets even darker, almost as if the process of consuming him was almost near to perfection.

"Draco" He forgot she even exists, he forgot about warm hands and warm eyes. All was cold for some time now, he grew accustomed to the cage. Her arms crept up on him slowly, as if she was trying to open the prisoner he lived in for years. He felt her lively flesh, his head against her breast. Her heart, jumping up and down softly against his skin.

"You're alive," he was uncharacteristically blabbering; it was as if a shock, "your little heart is beating"

The little bird trusted him, it was alive before he sacrificed it just so he can prove a point. It was a fight not to be fought in the first place yet he needed it to draw conclusions for him. That little bird ended up headless. Luna Lovegood was airy and perhaps, askew.

He cared for them,

right after he used them for his advantage.

"Go away, Lovegood" He tried to push her off, but she held her spot. She tightened her arms and her fingers combed his hair as gentle as how he yearned it.

He whimpered slightly, closing his eyes as her touch seem to calm the darkness behind his eyes. She hushed as she sensed him worry, as though she heard the dark lord's hissing inside his head.

"I can't do it, I can't do this" Her fingers stopped a millisecond, registering that it was not the usual Draco who was running away from her, but rather, from the devils that were taunting him. To his surprise, he already sagged from his knees, and his arms snaked around her hips.

"Hum?" Her chest vibrated as her soft sound echoed from her body. His heart, the thing that's been screaming from his body, hushed, it was still further down his stomach, lonely and tired, reaching for her comfort, though he doesn't know how to come closer.

He felt ugly. Hideous and was still, a killer, a coward.

"It's heart was beating, it was so fragile" He mumbled against her.

Her hands coaxed him to go outside his cage.

He felt the dark lord linger inside his brain.

"He lingers," fresh tears pour from his eyes and he hid in the safety of her chest. She smelled of the woods and peaches, and coward's tears. He shivered against her skin, seeing the fact that she was too small, he might smother her. And if he did, how can he forgive himself? "-He killed me"

She pulled away slightly, his head in the palms of her hands. The absence of her heartbeat made him open his eyes, scared that he'd be trapped in his head that's never been his for a while now. She was still there, standing beneath him as her face tilts down to look at him.

Her fingers tenderly traced the remnants of his tears, kind blue eyes staring at his blotchy ones. "Draco, my poor, poor beautiful Draco. You're alright now"

He could've pushed her off, lash out, hate her for shoving her pity on him. But surprisingly, his heart ached a bit more. Exhaustion made his muscles be all alert though poor in energy. All he wanted now was to leave the metal bars that deprived him of ever feeling things, in the safety of Luna's gaze, he was just Draco Malfoy.

Just a boy

with a name.

"I'm scared, Luna" His voice still cracked and he swore he heard a faint sob come from her lips.

The night sky illuminates and her face was hooded in shadow. She grew closer to him, her hair shielding his cheeks, then the whole of his face. Her lips press themselves to his forehead, "Draco? I need you to rest your heart"

"Don't you see? I can't-"

Her hand travelled below the side of his jawline and pressed. His heart went back to their usual place, making sounds from itself as they travel up to her fingers.

"You're alive, still" she stated, "close your eyes, rest with me"

"It's too dark, everything's too dark"

Her fingers brought his lids down, "I'm here, Draco. I'm here. I'll look after you."

As he sees the familiar blankness behind his eyes, she also held him gently in her arms. "Where are you, Luna?"

"I'm here" She was oh so close, he could feel her breath against his forehead, felt her lips brush his skin in a comforting manner. In the dark, he could even smell her as she travel around his thoughts and chase all the fear with her eyes. She shone like a beacon of light and she watched him as he try to surrender to sleep.

"You're my moon" He whispered as though it was a confession of a sin. Though how can one sweet, sweet woman ever be something to hide from the world?

"And I always see you, dragon. My human, capable of mistakes. My beautiful Draco" He missed her so. She was the only one who can calm him, can reach the deepest, darkest and even the purest facet of his being. Somewhere, in his heart and soul, he knew he belonged to her and no amount of intrusion could erase her influence.

The poison in his veins cannot beat the water that is her. With her warmth, she sends pieces of herself in his blood, renewing him, reminding him of the past that makes him ache. For the rest of his days, he'll lament of it. Lament for the girl with the golden heart, but for now, she lets him free. And he flew away from the world, towards he only home he ever knew. The night sky, with his moon. "


End file.
